reconcile

how do we ever reconcile with each other

when the other is me and I am the other?

do I really know that I am better than I think I am

or are both beings falsities ?

are we ever good enough - a question so large and yet so simple

and it gnaws at my skin so deeply that the blood doesn't seem enough

lately - I feel despicable

like I am a Phoenix unable to be reborn 

stuck in the ashes - oh so gray that was once golden 

like the stardust in my eyes and my veins

molten and rotten

desperate to be set free

caged by my own inhibitions 

betrayed by the mind that knows it can do better - that it can be better

I feel breathless lately - craving reconciliation 

dreaming of a far away land

the desire is eating me alive 

and so I scrape through the ashes

gnawing

waiting, for it to pass 

waiting to fly again